“I praise you because I am fearfully and wonderfully made; your works are wonderful, I know that full well." - Psalm 139:14 (NIV)
You never really know what someone may be going through.
I've been journaling consistently for the last six years, and I often read through my old journal entries. I realized that I have a common theme that I've written about over the years: my desire for companionship.
Ever since I was a kid, I always felt like the second-best choice. It seemed as if my sister got most of the attention from our dad. She was his favorite daughter (or so I thought), and I was second best.
When I got to 7th grade, I met my childhood best friend. She was a light-skinned beauty and musically gifted. We were attached at the hip, and for the first time, I felt like someone's first choice.
That soon ended when I moved to Baltimore during my junior year of high school. Everyone already had their friends, and once again I felt like second best.
Throughout college and into my 20's, I sought love in all the wrong places hoping that I would finally be someone's first choice, but I never was. A few failed "situationships," and one failed relationship left me feeling like I'll never be good enough.
But I know that's a lie because I'm already someone's first choice...God's.
Even though I've found my identity in Christ, I still have insecurities that try to get the best of me. Occasional thoughts tell me that I'm unlovable and try to distract me from focusing on the only true love that can fill every void in my life—the love of God.
“I praise you because I am fearfully and wonderfully made; your works are wonderful, I know that full well." - Psalm 139:14
We are God's first choice just as we are, baggage and all. We were fearfully and wonderfully made in the image of God.
Do you get that out of nearly 100 million sperm, only one won the race to fertilize your mother's egg and create you? That blows my mind!
You are a miracle handpicked by God.
When your insecurities rise and negative thoughts enter your mind, affirm the truth of what God says about you. Don't believe the lies!
Lie: "You're unlovable."
Truth: Actually, I'm not. I am God’s masterpiece and a new person in Christ so that I can do the good things He planned for me long ago (Ephesians 2:10).
Lie: "You'll never be someone's first choice."
Truth: I already am! Before I was conceived, God had plans for me (Jeremiah 1:5).
Lie: "God's forgotten about you."
Truth: No, he hasn't. If I wait on the Lord, I'll renew my strength. I'll mount up with wings like eagles, run and not be weary, and walk and not faint (Isaiah 40:31)
Don't let the enemy distract you from the truth of God's Word!
Having the desire for companionship is a healthy human desire if it doesn't take your focus away from God. Ecclesiastes 4:12 says, "A person standing alone can be attacked and defeated, but two can stand back-to-back and conquer. Three are even better, for a triple-braided cord is not easily broken."
We weren't created to be alone, but our companionship should be with God first. He is the center cord that we should build a foundation on before He adds anyone and anything to our lives.
God's love is the greatest love there is, and no one can ever love you like Him.
You will always be His first choice!
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Do great things with God.